The cost of a defeat.

Sweat ran across my face as he pushed me. Kicking, scratching, screaming I tried to fight away. But, he was too heavy and I felt very weak. I could feel my body go numb as his skin touched mine. With his hand on my mouth, I kept screaming to stop. But his cold eyes just…

A new version.

I thought everything was going to change with the new year. It was after so long I had finally picked up myself to let go of people who hurted me. I was finally doing something for myself. Even though it was very pleasing, it didn’t turn out to be as good as I expected. Now,…

The ruined side of me. Again.

“Mom let’s go”, my brother shouted. “Bye”, I said. I shut the door and moved towards my room, with my phone in one hand, a clenched fist, moistened eyes, and a pricking throat. I sat on my bed and before I could do anything, I bursted up. Tears streamed down. My nose turned red. I…

Not a pleasant morning afterall. 

It was dark outside. No sound to be heard. Everyone was in deep sleep, it seemed. I checked the clock and it was nearly three. This morning was different. I never woke up at three before. But, this time I was wide awake with random thoughts racing, and their voice echoing in my head. “You’ve…

I’m just tired.

​I’m tired of the feign love. I’m tired of the feign friendships. I’m tired of being let down everytime. I’m tired of being hurt. I’m tired of trying. I’m tired of pretending to be fine when I’m not. I’m tired of my flaws. I’m tired of feeling broken, damaged, worthless. I’m tired of letting people…